Becoming a new parent is an intense experience, a rollercoaster of emotions, filled with emotional ups and downs, lack of sleep, lots of coffee, and of course, a new tiny human that has all your love and attention.
Spending alone time with your partner is often the last thing on your mind during those first weeks with baby, but as time goes by and you adjust to your new family dynamics, making an effort to reconnect with your spouse is essential.
Maintaining a good relationship with your spouse and raising happy, healthy children is all about balance and should be a priority. Below I am sharing 5 tips to help you reignite your marriage after having kids.
5 Tips to Help you Reignite Your Marriage After Having Kids
1. Plan Date Night Well In Advance And Do Not Cancel
It is easy to make excuses and avoid a date night. After all, you are tired, your spouse is tired, finding childcare, setting everything up for the babysitter before you go, and getting yourself ready for a date may sound like a lot of work.
However, making an effort, planning a date night and sticking to it is so worth it. You’ll feel your connection reigniting, and you will be reminded of the reasons you chose each other before the kids came into your lives.
So next time you are thinking about getting tickets for that concert… don’t think twice and book it in advance. You’ll find a way to make it work!
2. Start a New Hobby Together
Make a list of the things you and your partner have in common, then find a new hobby or reintroduce an old hobby you used to have and do it together. Make sure it is something for just the two of you, without the kids. You can take a class, learn a new skill, join a sport’s group.
Make sure you schedule the babysitter for those times and enjoy the time you are spending together as a couple.
3. Try Something New and Surprise Your Partner
Next time you stop by the supermarket, head to the “Intimate Products” section and pick up a new personal lubricant or intimate gel. You will surprise your partner with something new and help spice up your private life.
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4. Be Appreciative and Practice Empathy
Parenting can be a tough job, and it may feel like you are stuck in a rut sometimes. Changing diapers, sleepless nights, late-night feeds, repeat. Make sure you voice your appreciation towards your partner and what they do to help. Whether they stay at home or go to work, practising empathy and putting yourself in their shoes is important.
Don’t just think about it. Let them know how you feel and how grateful you are for what they do and to be riding the parenting rollercoaster with them.
5. Take Care of Yourself and Prioritize Sleep
Don’t be afraid to ask for help and to take some time for yourself. Remember that you can’t give to others if you don’t take care of yourself first. Sleep is so important. Without it, you will feel cranky and tired, and you will never be in the mood to spend quality time with your partner.
Take a break whenever it is possible, hire a sitter and take a nap while they watch your child or sleep when your baby sleeps. Yes, your housework can wait. Your relationships are more important than cleaning the dust bunnies under the bed!
Did you have a hard time finding time to connect with your partner when you became a parent? Did you find any good strategies that worked for you?